Invasion of the Boy Snatchers Page 8

  Massie fell back onto the floor with nothing but a pair of tacky gold boots in her hands. “Ew.” She whipped them across the room.

  “You okay?” Alicia asked Nina softly.

  “Sí.” Nina turned to Massie. “If you want to try my boots on, just ask.”

  Massie pretended she hadn’t heard that.

  “Uh … can I try them?” Dylan asked shyly.

  “Yeah, me oot?” Kristen jumbled.

  Claire managed to keep herself out of the drama by straightening the sleeping bags for the fifth time.

  “Of course.” Nina smirked. She was looking at Massie.

  Massie kicked the boots over to Kristen and Dylan, who descended upon them like a pair of fashion-starved divas. They each grabbed one and slipped it on.

  “I brought two suitcases full of boots from Spain.” Nina piled her tangled wavy hair back into a bun. “You can borrow them whenever you want.”

  Kristen and Dylan’s eyes lit up. Then they both lost their balance and smashed into each other.

  Kristen rested her arm on Dylan’s shoulder and pulled off the boot. “They’re too big on me,” she whined.

  “Me too,” Dylan sniffled. “What size are you?”

  “Six,” Nina said.

  “Bummer, we’re vifes.”

  Dylan rolled her eyes. “Fives,” she explained to Nina.

  “Hey, Massie, we should make our own DIY versions of these boots next Friday,” Kristen said.

  “On!” Massie nodded.

  Kristen’s face lit up. “Really? Great! I love do-it-yourself crafts.”

  “Uh, Kris, on means no in jumble.” Massie smirked.

  Kristen looked down and pulled and imaginary hair off her flannel nightgown.

  An awkward, heavy silence filled the room. No one knew what to say next—not even Massie. She didn’t know how much longer she could stand Nina. The girl was like a pair of rayon polyester pants—cheap and irritating.

  Purumpppppp

  A low farting sound offered a welcome distraction.

  “’Scuse me.” Dylan waved at the air.

  Everyone laughed.

  The sound continued and grew louder.

  “Sorry. My brother, Todd, plays tuba in the marching band. He’s practicing for Friday’s game. If he does a good job, the conductor said he can march in the front row during the finals.”

  Nina covered her ears. “The Lyonses in your country sound more like dying walruses.”

  Kristen and Dylan laughed.

  “He’s practicing,” Claire insisted. “Give him a break.”

  “She was kidding,” Alicia assured her. “Right, Nina?”

  Nina shrugged and stepped into her boots.

  “She was kidding.” Alicia placed a reassuring hand on Claire’s back, until she heard her cell phone ring. “Ehmagod, what if it’s Josh Hotz!””

  “Why would it be Josh?” Massie asked, wondering why Derrington never called her on the weekends.

  “I told him the Laurens were coming over for dinner tonight,” Alicia said.

  “As in Ralph?” Kristen squealed.

  “Yeah.” Alicia bit her bottom lip. “Do you think he actually bought it?”

  “Answer it!” Dylan prompted

  “Hurry,” Kristen shouted.

  “I’m trying.” Alicia strolled leisurely across the room but swung her arms quickly.

  Massie darted over to Alicia’s navy velvet Ralph hobo bag and pulled out the ringing phone. She tossed it to Alicia, who caught it with one hand, flipped it open with her thumb, and brought it to her ear in one swift motion. She raised her finger in the air, demanding immediate silence.

  “Heh-lloooh?” Alicia cooed in a low come-hither voice. Her alert, wide eyes slowly softened … and then shut. “Oh, hola, Celia.” Alicia sounded tired and bored. “It’s for you,” she mouthed to Nina.

  Nina waved her hand. “Mañana,” she whispered back.

  “Celia, she’ll call you back tomorrow.” Alicia snapped her phone shut. “Why won’t you talk to your sister?” she asked Nina.

  “She’s boring.”

  “Can we please do something fun?” Massie insisted.

  “Like what?” Dylan asked.

  “Let’s play Wear or Dare,” Massie suggested.

  “Yeah!” everyone shouted.

  “Is that some sort of little kiddie game?” Nina asked.

  “No, it’s fun,” Claire promised. “If you don’t do the dare you have to wear—”

  Nina interrupted. “Who wants a sexy Spanish makeover?”

  Kristen and Dylan’s hands shot straight up in the air, but Alicia only lifted her arm halfway.

  “You should start with a brush and some makeup remover,” Massie mumbled.

  Claire covered her mouth and giggled.

  Alicia lowered her arm.

  Nina walked over to the sleeping bags and sat down on Massie’s. She dumped a bag full of exotic Spanish cosmetics on the floor and swished them around like a card dealer trying to mix up the deck.

  Massie pointed her speakers directly at Nina, then blasted her Destiny’s Child CD. She laughed to herself as she hurried into her bathroom to grab her hair crimper. “Who wants to get crimped?”

  “Very funny.” Kristen tugged on her short blond hair.

  Nina touched Kristen lightly on the arm and mouthed, “Let it go.”

  Dylan tossed her thick curly red hair over her shoulders. “If you crimped my hair, I’d never be able to squeeze myself out the front door.”

  “You look absolutely beautiful just the way you are, Deelan.”

  Dylan smiled and slid closer to Nina.

  “You can do mine,” Claire offered

  “And mine,” Alicia agreed.

  “Done.”

  Massie plugged the crimper into the socket, piled a stack of decorative purple goose-down pillows against her headboard, and leaned back.

  “Come, sit.” She patted her duvet.

  Alicia and Claire sat in front of her with their legs crossed.

  The red light flashed on the side of the crimper. “It’s ready.” Massie reached for a chunk of Claire’s white-blond hair and pressed it between the hot corrugated plates. When she released it, a waft of smoke drifted toward the ceiling, and Claire’s hair was crinkled.

  Claire felt the back of her head. “This feels so cool. I want one.”

  “It looks ah-mazing.” Massie reached for Alicia’s hair next.

  “So, Deelan, who are you going to ask to dance?” Nina was shouting above the music and pressing a glittery fake eyelash on Dylan’s small eyelid. Kristen was beside them, lining her lips with a burgundy pencil.

  Massie was eavesdropping on their conversation while she crimped Alicia’s hair. The more Nina said to her friends, the harder Massie gripped the iron.

  “Do you smell something burning?” Alicia asked.

  Massie quickly released her grip and waved the gray cloud of smoke away from Alicia’s singed hair. “No.”

  “I dunno who to ask yet.” Kristen bit her lip.

  “Me either,” Dylan murmured as Nina pressed the lash against her eye.

  “Just pick the best kisser.” Nina nodded.

  “Who’s that?” Kristen asked.

  “You don’t know?” Nina dropped the lash on Dylan’s sushi pajama top. “Dios, you act like you’ve never made out with anyone before.”

  Kristen was silent. Dylan sneezed.

  Nina looked up at the bed. “Of course you’ve all kissed boys before, right?” She stood up. “Right?”

  Massie’s heart started to race. She couldn’t let Nina know the truth. “I don’t kiss and tell.” She silently prayed that Claire and Alicia would back her up. And they did, by keeping their mouths shut.

  Nina walked over to the round dimmer switch on Massie’s wall and turned down the lights. Then she sauntered over to Kristen and Dylan while twirling one of the dangling laces from her slip around her finger. “How about we make this interesting?” she s
aid. “I will give three pairs of my boots to the first girl who kisses a boy at the dance.”

  “But they’re too big,” Dylan complained.

  “EBay,” Kristen whispered.

  “Or thick socks. This goes for you too.” Nina turned toward Massie, Alicia, and Claire.

  “I wouldn’t even burn those hooker boots for warmth.” Massie pressed down on a chunk of Claire’s hair with the iron.

  “Claire?” Nina offered

  “Nah. I want my first kiss with Cam to be romantic, not part of a bet.”

  Claire had no problem admitting she was a lip virgin, and Massie secretly wished she had the luxury of being that honest. But a statement like that would probably ruin her reputation.

  “Cousin?” Nina asked Alicia.

  Alicia looked at Massie, then at Nina, then at Massie again. “Uh, that’s okay. I’m good.”

  Nina stood over Kristen and Dylan. “I guess it’s just you two.”

  “I’m in.” Kristen giggled. “I’ll go for Kemp Hurley. He’s a total perv. I heard he holds his cell phone under girls’ skirts and takes pictures of their underwear. He’ll totally want to make out.”

  Massie was shocked. When had Kristen become so slutty?

  “I’m in too.” Dylan coughed. “I’ll go for Chris Plovert. The whole leg cast thing will make it easy for me to catch him. I won’t have to run at all.”

  “Who are you going to go for?” Alicia asked Nina.

  “I’m going to leave it open.”

  “That’s social suicide.” Alicia’s eyes were wide. “There won’t be anyone left.”

  Nina turned to face Alicia. “Por fah-vor, look at me. I can get anyone I want.”

  “Puh-lease.” Massie slammed her crimper down on her night table. She marched over to the dimmer switch and turned the lights up to maximum brightness. “Look at your style! You are a walking don’t!”

  Claire cracked up. Alicia semi-smiled, then bit her lip.

  “You girls better be nice to me.” Nina pretended to string three arrows in a bow. “Or I just might go after Derringtons, Cam, and Josh. There’s no rule that says I can’t shoot all three.”

  Massie felt a sudden wave of nausea. She didn’t have to be an archery expert to know that Nina had perfect form. And she would hardly be afraid to use it.

  “And what makes you think they’ll actually want to go with you?” Massie countered.

  “These.” Nina pointed to her gigantic boobs.

  Massie’s insides froze. She had finally met her match.

  THE BLOCK ESTATE

  MASSIE’S BEDROOM

  Saturday, January 31st 9:55 A.M.

  Massie and the girls woke up to the sound of a wrecking ball smashing into the guesthouse.

  “It sounds like your bowling birthday party,” Dylan said to Kristen.

  “Only a billion times louder,” Kristen agreed.

  They shimmied out of their sleeping bags and threw open Massie’s curtains. In a mater of seconds, the stately stone cottage was reduced to a pathetic heap of rubble and rocks.

  “Cooool,” they all whispered before returning to the warmth of their sleeping bags.

  The backyard was flooded with the milky gray light of January. Usually the bare shivering trees outside her window made Massie feel cold, lonely, and sad, even if nothing was bothering her. But this morning she felt fine. She wasn’t even dreading the moment when her friends’ parents would pick them up and take them home, because for the first time Massie wouldn’t be left alone. Claire was there.

  When the doorbell rang, all the girls jumped up and started gathering their stuff. But Claire sat peacefully on her sleeping bag, painting her toenails metallic blue. Even though her curved spine made her look like a harp and half of her hair was crimped while the other half was super-straight, Massie was overcome with appreciation for her roommate.

  There was a light knock on the door before it opened. “Girls, Alicia’s driver is here.” Kendra was dressed in a tight black unitard and had tied an emerald green Hermès scarf around her tiny waist. White stretch socks swallowed her tiny calves and vanished into a pair of metallic red Nikes. A red-and-white-striped visor that said MEOW in red rhinestones kept her freshly highlighted hair away from her face.

  “Mom, you look like the Cat in the Hat.” Massie wished her friends didn’t have to witness such a brutal outfit.

  Claire looked up. Her eyes were red and puffy and the tip of her nose looked purple.

  “What’s wrong with my Versace exercise suit?” Kendra turned around as if she were chasing her own tail.

  “I think its super-cool,” Nina promised.

  “Of course you do,” Massie hissed.

  “It looks so good on you, Mrs. Block.” Nina oozed charm. “How do you stay so fit?”

  “Nina, you are so sweet.” Kendra blushed. Her smile was wide and sincere, despite her recent injection of Botox. “We converted our horse shed into a gym, so I’ve been working out a lot lately. I have a trainer coming over in ten minutes to teach a Pilates-cardio-kickboxing-Ashtanga-yoga class. You can join us if you like.”

  Massie shot Alicia a desperate glance.

  “Uh, thanks, Mrs. Block, but Nina—”

  Alicia was cut off.

  “I would love to.” Nina clapped her hands together. Then her expression changed to one of regret. “But I don’t have any workout clothes here.”

  “Oh, that’s no big deal.” Kendra bounced over to Massie’s closet and tugged on her feather boa to turn on the light. “Borrow anything you’d like.”

  Massie couldn’t stand it when her mother treated strangers like family.

  “That would be great. Thanks, Mrs. B.” Nina stood up and walked over to the closet.

  “Oh, please sit down,” Massie offered in her sweetest voice. “Let me get something for you.”

  Massie stepped into her closet and pulled out an old sweat-stained wife-beater and a pair of tight Adidas sweats. They were blue with white stripes running up the sides. She quietly reached for a Prada shoe box off one of her shelves and pulled out a pair of squeaky scissors and quickly cut a hole in the butt.

  “Here you go.” Massie held out the clothes for Nina. “Sorry I can’t give you any sneakers—I’m a size five and you’re a six.”

  “That’s okay, I’ll wear my boots. It’s good for my calves.” Nina stepped out of her black slip in front of everyone and slid on the pants.

  Dylan, Kristen, and Alicia saw Nina’s butt cheek sticking out and started laughing. Massie lifted her index finger to her mouth and slowly shook her head.

  Kendra didn’t notice. She was crouched down beside Claire, examining her face.

  “Claire, we have to get you to a doctor.” Kendra sounded alarmed. “Your face is all puffy and red. You’re having a reaction. Do you have any allergies?”

  Claire hesitated and avoided Massie’s eyes. “Uh, sometimes I can be allergic to dogs but—”

  “Bean!” Kendra said.

  The dog shot out from under Massie’s bed like a hairy bullet and ran out of the room.

  “I’m sure I’m just catching Dylan’s cold,” Claire promised.

  “Uh, no offense, Claire, but I don’t look like a Sharpe. You have something else.”

  Massie elbowed her in the ribs. “It’s not Bean. That’s impossible.”

  “Is my mom here?” Claire asked Kendra.

  “She went to some crafts fair down at the church. Why? Are you having trouble breathing? Is your throat locked? Can you swallow?”

  “I’m okay,” Claire whispered softly. “Just a little hot and itchy.”

  “Then we’ll deal with this after my class. Ready, Nina?”

  “Sí.” Nina doused her neck in musky perfume and skipped out of the room behind Kendra.

  Massie could feel the weight of her hanging jaw.

  “Sorry.” Alicia threw her red Coach weekend bag over her shoulder and shrugged. “I won’t bring her again. I promise.”

  You better
not, Massie wanted to say, but she couldn’t speak. She felt like someone had filled her entire body with gooey Marshmallow Fluff. It was hard enough to watch Nina and her mother bonding, but Claire’s Bean allergy? Massie couldn’t believe her luck. Now Claire would have to leave.

  Massie paced around her room, tidying. She placed three crystal bowls filled with pretzel crumbs and melted Junior Mints outside her bedroom door so Inez could take them to the kitchen. While she straightened her bed, Massie tried to think of something positive about Claire leaving to keep herself from crying. At least her room would be tidy again. And that was positive, right?

  Claire was rolling up the sleeping bags, sniffling, probably thinking about the same thing. But Massie had no comforting words. If she had, she would have used them on herself.

  “Where’s my hair crimper?” Massie checked the night table, looked between her sheets, felt under her bed, and lifted up her pillows. It was gone.

  “I dunno,” Claire mumbled from behind the stack of pillows she was holding in her arms.

  Inez tapped lightly on the door and then let herself in. She was carrying a wicker laundry basket filled with fresh linens. Like a robot programmed for efficiency, Inez dropped the basket on the floor and walked straight over to Massie’s bed. She tore the sheets off, rolled them into a tight ball, and stuffed them in the basket. In a matter of minutes the bed was dressed in a brand-new set of white sheets and pillowcases.

  “I like my purple sheets. What are you doing?”

  Inez bent down and lifted up the tiny puppy. She dropped her in the laundry basket and tucked Bean’s bed under her free arm.

  “I have to get rid of all things that are covered in dog,” Inez announced.

  “What? Why?” Massie screeched. She could hear Bean whimpering inside the basket.

  “Mrs. Block said so.” Inez swiftly made her way to the door. “To fight the allergies.”

  “Nooooo!” Massie shouted. “She can’t do that!”

  Bean started barking.

  “You think I like it?” Inez scowled. “Mrs. Block says now the puppy dog sleeps with me!” She slammed the door shut behind her.

  Massie turned and looked at Claire’s puffy face. “How could you just stand there and let that happen? Why didn’t you tell them that it was just a cold?”